Forgiveness

My ninth grade year was one of the most difficult times in my life. I didn't know how to deal with all the loss I was experiencing and so I closed myself off. It seemed to me like all my friends just threw me away. They didn't seem to care. It started with this story. This was the turning point in my life.

It’s Better to Stand Alone

Lauren M., Utah, USA

I went to a party one with a group of my closest friends. As we sat laughing, the conversation turned. My friends started to gossip about a young man we all knew who was my friend. The conversation went on for a while with everyone except me agreeing with what was being said. Eventually I had enough. I expressed my feelings that it was wrong for them to belittle this young man.

The room went silent, and no one stood by me. I had never felt so alone in my life than at that moment. Eventually the conversations moved on, but everyone ignored me. I decided to call my mom to come pick me up. Then I announced that I was going home. No one asked questions, and small good-byes were said as I left.

It was hard for me to go against my friends, but I knew that it was the right thing to do. This experience changed my life, and I feel good about my decision to stick up for this young man. I learned that even if you stand alone, you should always do what’s right. Your crowd may not be the crowd you’re meant to be with. It’s better to stand alone and do what’s right than to stand with others doing wrong.  (January 2012 New Era, Stand For Truth)

“We have been and continue to be taught God’s laws. Despite what you may see or hear elsewhere, these laws are unchanging.

“As we go about living from day to day, it is almost inevitable that our faith will be challenged. We may at times find ourselves surrounded by others and yet standing in the minority or even standing alone concerning what is acceptable and what is not. Do we have the moral courage to stand firm for our beliefs, even if by so doing we must stand alone? … It is essential that we are able to face—with courage—whatever challenges come our way." (January 2012 New Era, Stand For Truth)

This experience impacted my life more than anything else. I had consequences for what I did. I was judged and rejected by my friends and that sent me into a state of depression. I felt alone and shut out. I didn't feel like there was anyone I could turn to. 

Then, I was given this pamphlet. It was given to me by a therapist and it was titled "The peace that comes through forgiveness". I have read it on multiple occasions and it has changed my life. I consider it scripture, because it has set a new standard of living for me. The thing I loved the most in this book was this poem on forgiveness:

Therefore look gently on men

And even more gently on women.

Although they may go a little wrong,

Do not condemn them.

Above all consider not merely what they have done,

But why.

God alone has the power to look into a human heart,

To judge actions and motives and regrets.

He alone knows not only what one has done and why,

But what one has resisted doing and why—

Man’s responsibility is to forgive:

Only God has the authority to judge.

            - Robert Burns

"I will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men." - Jesus Christ

"Only Christ is in a position to judge. None of us are in a position to judge anyone, for we are far from perfect. In the meantime, if we take offense we are required to forgive all men. This is not just suggested, or a good idea, but required!"

Peter asked Jesus, "Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Till seven times?" Jesus saith unto him, "I say not unto thee, until seven times but until seventy times seven."

I do not believe Jesus meant that we must forgive someone four hundred and ninety times. As humans we have a very good memory. We don't forget and we especially do not forgive hurts or offenses. What we must do is forgive that person when we think of the hurt or offense which may be even more than four hundred and ninety times, but each time it will become easier and easier to forgive.

I took this lesson into my life and I acted on it. I thought about the hurts and offenses that people had done to me, but I also had thought why and I came to forgive them and to love them again. I became happier and each time I thought of the offense I forgave over again until I didn't think of the offense as an offense. I thought of it as an opportunity to grow and to draw closer to Christ and was grateful to them. I thank God for my trials every time I say a prayer. I thank him for those people who taught me to forgive and for those people who helped me to grow and become the person I am, because I have been able to love that person.

Forgive others for you are required to forgive. It was benefit your life in so many ways. I am a witness of that. Take time to thank God for your trials and the gift of forgiveness. Ask Him to help you to be able to forgive those who have offended and hurt you. Ask Him to help you love them. He will strengthen you to forgive and to love. It is the greatest lesson I have been taught and I will carry it with me throughout my life. 

My New Era story: http://www.lds.org/new-era/2012/01/stand-for-truth?lang=eng